How can I improve my self-esteem?

 

Dear Daughters,

Low self-esteem is a topic I have struggled with.  I had to  learn to appreciate my self worth. It took some time but I can honestly say I love myself and my self -esteem is growing daily.

So what is self-esteem? Self-esteem is a condition of awareness, an attitude, an appreciation of yourself and all you have to give to others.

These days, it is often hard to have this appreciation. Society’s increased values for beauty, extreme wealth and celebrity have many people feeling they fall short of expectations.

Although it may seem difficult, there are ways to boost your self-esteem.

Here are some tips for increasing the love you have for yourself:

  • Make a list of the things you like about yourself. Put the list in a special notebook. Whenever you start to feel down on yourself, pull out these notes and read them over.
  • Ask a friend for a list of things people like about you. Sometimes, when it is difficult to find things we like about ourselves, friends can quickly point them out. Be accepting of these points and see them as truths.
  • Whenever anyone says something nice about you, write it down. Again, keeping a notebook or a set of index cards with these positive messages helps you realize why you are important to others and why you should also value your own self worth.
  • Make it part of your daily routine to praise something in yourself. Think about something you did within the course of the day that made you or someone else feel good. Then be sure to praise yourself in the way you would praise a friend who did well.
  • Say daily affirmations. Daily affirmations can help you hear good things about yourself. You might consider saying your affirmation while looking in a mirror so you can see yourself as the important person you are.
  • Love yourself like a friend. The reason you enjoy your friends is because they are much like yourself. So if you love and appreciate your friends, turn those same feelings on yourself as well.
  • Realize that love comes from within. Many people, especially people who have survived years of abuse, often look for acceptance and love from others. They feel when they have won another’s approval, they are then worthy of approval and appreciation. While it is difficult to do, you must realize that to love yourself is truly valuable. You do not need others to confirm that you are a good person worthy of appreciation and love. You deserve it.
  • Change your body posture and breathing. Your body stores emotions in physical ways and often shows how you feel. When you are depressed, you may slump more, tighten the muscles in your hands, jaw, shoulders, or neck and breathe shallowly. Recognize these physical traits in yourself and begin to make some changes. You may find that when you do, you will begin feeling more positive overall because you will be more relaxed with yourself.
  • Do comforting and nurturing things for yourself. Make yourself something warm to drink, wrap yourself in a blanket or quilt, listen to music or read a book. These small efforts will make you feel more secure and that security will make you feel better about yourself overall.
  • Surround yourself with loving people as much as possible. Your friends, spouse and significant others should love and respect you as well. Often, it is difficult to find these people if you believe yourself unworthy of those kinds of relationships. However, you are worthy and people in relationships with you should honor your feelings about yourself.
  • Find a therapist to offer support. We all need a little push sometimes. A therapist or support person can offer positive reinforcement and compassion. Remember that therapists can only help you if you are willing to help yourself. You must realize you are a good person; a therapist will never convince you if you cannot see it in yourself.

Resources

So Daughters the things you say to yourself play a big part in how you feel about yourself. Lets think happy sappy thoughts! And when you don’t remember the tips above!

As Always

Love Mom

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